Hello and welcome back to the wonderful world of the Dogpound. I hope you have been taking care of yourself, and as for myself,...

Hello and welcome back to the wonderful world of the Dogpound.

I hope you have been taking care of yourself, and as for myself, I have been struggling a bit with that issue. Nothing major mind you. No need to call 911 or anything like that; I have just had a few near-misses where I have been pushing my guardian angel to work overtime. For instance….the other day I got the “hungries” for some good old french fries. I like my fries extra crispy, while being soft and hot in the center. So happens my local grocery store was advertising some new frozen Idaho French fries that seemed to fit the bill, and I picked up a bag during my regular Saturday grocery shopping. That evening, I was getting ready to start supper, and I was going to cook those french fries along with some fresh hand-made sliders of deli meat, fresh rolls, garden tomatoes, and cheese. Then it dawned on me that I probably did not have any ketchup; got to have ketchup with my crispy fries. Sure enough…a quick check of the fridge and there was no ketchup to be found. I think I tossed the last bottle when I cleaned the refrigerator out a few months ago. It was half-full, but it had been in there a long time. I guess ketchup can go bad? Mustard? Don’t know. Anyway, off to the store I went. The store is only about 10 minutes from my house so it was not that big a deal to get my supper menu back on track. Just as I pulled into the parking lot, it started to sprinkle. By the time I had made my purchase, a light rain had turned into a torrent of rain. The layout of the store is such that you cannot walk straight out into the parking lot…you have to turn right or left to exit the store and then make a sharp left or right to head into the parking lot. Since it was raining so hard and I did not want to melt (I am talking about me being made out of sugar, and not that stuff the Wicked Witch of the West was made out of!), I go charging out the door, down the ramp and make my left hand turn, and there in the crosswalk, was a car coming from my blind side. There was still several feet between us, so no harm no foul, but I am sure we were both very surprised and a bit thankful that I did not become a hood ornament on his car. [Sidebar….the fries were very good.] I have a second incident to share…more hilarity in the Dogpound, but you are going to have to wait till next week to discover what happens next. (Ominous music in background.)

“If safety is a joke, then death is the punchline.” – Dogpound Wisdom

An engineer and a psychiatrist meet up for their 20th anniversary college reunion. The engineer says, “I’m surprised to see you still looking so young. I’d have thought listening to people’s problems all day would have given you a mass of wrinkles.” The psychiatrist says, “You think we listen?”

Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The first blonde said: “These look like deer tracks.” And the other one said: “No they look like moose tracks.” They argued and argued for a while, and they were still arguing when the train hit them.

That is all I have for today. As always, be good, do good, play safe, and remember to look both ways when entering a crosswalk, even if you are melting.

– JR