Among the many people who lost their lives in the last year was an 86-year old man in Atlanta known as the “Baby Whisperer.” He earned the name after volunteering for many years at his local hospital. Following retirement from the sales field, he decided to undergo training in order to help premature and sick newborns thrive. The work, among other things, consisted of gently cradling the precious newborns while their parents were not there. Notably he would say the effect on him was greater than what he thought it had on them.
This man’s story made me, once again, think about RESILIENCE. But, what is resilience? And why is it so important? In the helping professions (nurses, teachers, police officers, fire fighters, counselors) resilience is considered to be of upmost importance. Resilience is an interesting phenomenon. And due to the pressures brought on as a result of the pandemic, research has certainly ramped up in this area of human development. Simply stated, it’s the ability to “bounce back” from a traumatic event or tragedy such as the death of a loved one, an illness, workplace or financial stress, family stressors, etc.
Although genetic factors contribute to ones level of resilience, the good news is, resilience can be learned. By practicing certain skills coupled with healthy lifestyle habits, you can build that mental toughness many seek. Resilience can be compared to learning to ride a bike. In the beginning it’s difficult due to low strength or poor balance or coordination. But by pushing through the initial discomfort and continuing to practice are you able to build resistance and balance, thus making bike riding an enjoyable experience.
Never underestimate the power of showing love through kind acts and words. One way to build resilience is by volunteering. It can not only give you the opportunity to make new friends, but also to build a sense of community and generate a sense of purpose. Volunteering also helps counteract the effects of stress, anxiety, and even anger. Theres no better stress reliever than establishing a genuine and meaningful connection to another human being.
But perhaps you simply don’t feel motivated to volunteer or don’t have the time or energy to sign up at a local food bank or nursing home. It’s true that social distancing can make it especially challenging. So, is there anything else you can do to build resilience? Perhaps you may want to try one of the following:
Learn ways to manage strong feelings by way of prayer, talking to a close friend and/or self-reflection.
Practice flexibility. Try to be open to learning new things. Resist the tendency to shut yourself up to new experiences.
Finding meaning and purpose in life. This can be accomplished by recognizing what you value the most.
Some think you’re either born tough or not. Thinking this way can leave the rest of us to feel hopeless at times. Based on research, it appears we have some level of control over our level of resilience or mental toughness as we get older. Knowing that you have a sense of control over your level of resilience is definitely a good start.