This past year our dog Charlie Blue turned 3. As I think back to when he was a puppy, I remember feeling a combination of hopefulness and excitement. My ultimate goal was to train him to be a therapy dog. I wanted to share him with patients at local hospitals and nursing homes so they could experience the joy and peace I felt when petting him. It took a year and a half, a few biting incidents and a handful of trainers to accept the fact that he wasn’t therapy dog material. Sadly, he has a strong temperament coupled with a vigorous prey drive. Once I realized this, the only way I could fulfill my role as a responsible pet owner was to accept this new reality and learn how to properly handle him.
Blue
My experience with Charlie Blue has somehow led me to reflect upon the times we’re living in. It goes without saying, that the past year has been filled with much uncertainty and turbulence. Ideological differences have led some to head straight into feelings of righteousness, resentment, faultfinding, harassment, and anger. While it’s sometimes easier to focus on differences, it’s important to remember that it’s indeed a CHOICE. Although sometimes differences can be greater, similarities to one another still exist and focusing on these is the health, and therefore smarter choice.
The healthy choice.
How we choose to view others is a choice. But is accepting people for who they are or what they do mean that we agree with their beliefs or actions? No. For the purposes of this article, acceptance means opening up to reality as it is. Agreement means harmonizing in opinion or feeling with what is. Acknowledging others despite differences can be a roadmap to inner peace.
Reality is that, for now, the pandemic continues; perhaps the candidate you voted for is not leading this country, or your family member or friend doesn’t behave as you wish. Opening yourself to reality can enable you to recognize the things we have no control over (i.e. do not have the power to change). But how do you reach acceptance?
Surrendering to a higher power is the backbone of acceptance.
Stop and think for a moment how much you like it when you feel that another person completely accepts you. It’s a graceful gift, and we can give it to ourselves and others when we accept them. Accepting others – be it family members, friends, acquaintances or strangers – for who they are drives peaceful human interactions. It helps enforce healthy boundaries and respectful interactions.
Who doesn’t like to hear words like hope, joy, and peace? Now that we’ve started a new year, why not make an individual effort to put into practice these precious words? Practicing to think and “do good” takes discipline and determination, but the benefits certainly outweigh the efforts. We’re one step closer to reaching mutual peace when we choose the path to inner peace.
As far as my four-legged friend, the journey to acceptance hasn’t been easy. I struggled with denial, frustration and at times anger. I wanted him to be different…calmer, friendlier, gentler. It took me some time, but having arrived here has certainly brought me inner peace and a newfound respect for my beloved companion. In the end, I can’t change who he is; I can only change how I feel.
Surrender comes before acceptance.
Acceptance leads to forgiveness.
Forgiveness is the final destination towards inner peace.
